Ok, who programs the dictionary in these “smart phones”. There are words in there that don’t belong, and I know I didn’t put them there. Just screw up one letter, and you get something you didn’t intend, at all. And if you don’t catch it……things can get interesting. It insists that “moron” is moribund, and changes “trailer” to virgin (WTF?). And don’t EVER text Puss n Boots to ANYONE. That’s not what your phone will say. Yes, this did happen to me. Autocorrect hell.

And never, ever, use speech recognition and predictive text at the same time. It won’t turn out well, I can promise you that. You might even wind up propositioning someone, and it will be someone you have no wish to proposition. That conversation won’t go quite right, and you will never live it down.

I swear, my phone is a pervert. Always read your texts before hitting send. It’s easier than explaining later.

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